So I had one of my first "Holy Shit, What Did My Child Just Say?" moments tonight. Eibhlin and I were in line at Wal-Mart, waiting patiently as our checker scanned our goods. Slowly. Oh so slowly.
Eibhlin was sitting in the cart, handing me items to put on the belt, when all of a sudden she leaned in and (loudly) whispered, "She's fat!"...she, of course, would be our SO SLOW checker.
I shushed her as subtly as possible; I put my finger to my mouth in the universal symbol for "SHUT UP!" and "Shhhhhhhh"-ed her as quietly as I could. Our checker, fortunately, didn't hear- at least I don't think she did. At least I HOPE she didn't.
And that was the end of that, I thought.
On the way home, Eibhlin asked me why she wasn't allowed to say that someone was fat. Hmmmm....how DOES one explain that to a three year old girl without 1) talking over her head or 2) giving her the beginning of her own weight complex?
Here's how our conversation went from there:
ME: You shouldn't tell someone that they are fat because it makes people feel bad when you say that.
EIBHLIN: Why?
ME: Well, because for some people, being fat is not a good thing. And if they are unhappy about being that way, then having someone say something about it makes them even more unhappy.
EIBHLIN: Hmmm. Can I ever say it?
ME: No, Eibhlin. You really shouldn't. Just because someone is bigger than you, or mom, or dad, or anyone else doesn't mean you can say that to them. It's just not very nice.
EIBHLIN: What does it do if I say that?
ME: It hurts their feelings, honey.
EIBHLIN: (crying) Oh, you mean it hurts her heart.
ME: Yes, baby, that's exactly what I mean...
EIBHLIN: (crying even more now) Oh, I am so sorry I said that, Mommy. I didn't want her to feel bad...I am so sorry I said it.
Of course I consoled her and let her know that it was okay, that she hadn't made anyone's heart hurt, and that she is, hands down, the best damn three year old in the world.
Who says pre-schoolers can't figure out how to try on someone else's shoes and walk around in them for a bit?
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